I am so over New Year’s resolutions. So over them.
Why, you ask?
Well, a lot of reasons. First of all, they just seem so violent. This is what they sound like to me:
“After this arbitrary date and time, I will be different. I will then beat myself up continuously when I do not miraculously change. I will then use my inability to change (without any support or structures to help me, mind you) as ammunition to beat myself up for the rest of the year until I promise, once again, to repeat this painful cycle.”
Ow. Ow ow ow.
It hurt me back in the days when I half-heartedly made (and forgot) resolutions of my own, and it hurts me to see other people doing it.
I feel so much sadness when I see people rushing to the gym at the beginning of January, exercising in a way that hurts, thinking that the pain will make them prettier and more virtuous.
They’re already so pretty. And virtue? It can take a hike, for all I care.
In addition to the fact that they hurt (ouch), resolutions send a very distinct (and poorly disguised) message with which I disagree entirely.
New Year’s resolutions are another way of saying:
“I am not okay the way I am. I need to change. I need to get better. I cannot like myself the way I am now.”
And that is so far from the truth.
Because you are okay the way you are. You don’t need to change. You don’t need to get better. You can like yourself the way you are now.
You will need support, though. You’ll need structures in place to help you in liking who you are. You’ll need a band of merry friends, people who adore you and extol your virtues regularly. You’ll need a way to demonstrate to yourself what your talents are and what you can accomplish.
I know it hurts. Trust me, I know. I also know that it can get better. You can flush your resolutions down the drain, and it can feel good.
Mine are already long gone.